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Like Wonder Woman, only in stilettos.....
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All About Me
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Holla at Your Girl!
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All About Me: Typhoid Mary
Dude. Dumb stuff happens to me. Weird stuff happens to me. It just does. I remember one time, my aunt sent me to the store to get a loaf of bread. I was riding my five speed. On the way home, the bread managed to get caught between the frame and the wheel and I smushed it. She just looked at me when I tried to explain what happened.
I decided to tackle my closet finally. I stacked the jeans on my closet shelves and started hanging up my clothes on the built in rails attached to the shelves. I was singing along with Coldplay and it took me a long minute to realize that my clothes were so heavy that they were pulling the brackets holding up the shelving out of the wall. I kept staring at the shelf, knowing something was wrong with it, but unsure of what it was. I don't know how long I stood there before I realized that the shelf was sagging in the middle from the weight of the clothes. I felt so dumb that all I could do was laugh.
Tonight, I went to my belly dancing class and was running late. I tried to pull my keys out of the ignition and couldn't. I left the keys there and went in to class. I tried to jiggle them loose after class, but no dice. I drove home and tried and tried and couldn't pull the key out of the ignition. I got the brilliant idea of trying to untwist the key ring and then pull the keys off. Using the other end of a spoon (the only metal thing I had in my car), I got it halfway undone and MacGuyver would have been proud of me, but couldn't get it to uncoil all the way and didn't want the key to break in the ignition. Normally, when bad things happen, like flat tires or running out of gas or a battery dying, the Good Lord sends a man to help me. I wanted to fix this myself. After 35 minutes, I gave up, took a chance, and called my dad. He's been working in Odessa for the past two months, but I sent up a silent prayer that he was still here from the weekend.
He answered and the first words out of his mouth were, "What did you do now?" Yes, bad stuff follows me around like a second skin. Like the time I locked my keys on the seat of my car at the car wash. Or the time I accidentally took off his side mirror trying to back his car into the garage. Or the time I fell off the roof trying to hang Christmas lights. He drove to my house, pulled out some tool, and cut the metal on the key ring, laughing the whole time. He took before and after pictures with his camera phone because he said that no one would believe it if they didn't see it for themselves.
This is yet another example of why I'm called 'Typhoid Mary' in my family.
State of the Union: Sheepish
Listening to: Not a damn thing |
Posted: 11:14 PM, Wed 27 Aug 2008 in All About Me |
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Untitled Comment
| LOL, can that be your new nickname? |
Posted by LauriesAsylum at 2:57 AM, Thu 28 Aug 2008 |
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Untitled Comment
| Sounds like my daughter... =] |
Posted by windy at 9:13 AM, Thu 28 Aug 2008 |
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| And it also sounds like my son....one unfortunate accident or incident after another...lol |
Posted by lisalisabobisa at 1:44 AM, Sat 30 Aug 2008 |
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